Funny Fb Status - Funny Facebook Status

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Funny Facebook Statuses 

I wish my boyfriend to be like Google, who has answers to all my questions.

Wherever I get a crush there is always too much of rush and all I have in my hands now is candy crush.

My wife and me both lived a very happy life and never quarreled with each other for over 26 years. Then one day we met and got married.

Beware! I know Marshall arts/ karate/ kung fu and above all even the spelling of  taekwondo.

Don't challenge me as two things may happen. Either you will loose or I will win. Once I was face to face with the lion and just when it jumped, I switched off the TV.

My doctor friend's wife never eats apple – I am sure you can guess why?

I am very sweet, the mosquitoes in my house prove it well as they are always after my blood.

Don't you people have any other work, I check Face book every five minutes and you are all always there.

I ask my mother  as to what I can do to move ahead fast in my life. She give me a big stone and said - simply hit this on your mobile and break it into two – how true

People ask me as to what I saw in you, that I fall in love with you – I always tell them love is blind.

Don't leave any one who challenges you, provided he is not better built than you.

Does your boyfriend irritate you too much? Don't worry someone better is just around.

These days even all dumb guys have girlfriend, thank god I am not that dumb.

There are 3 levels of insanity - 1st level is when you searching for a girlfriend, 2nd level starts when you actually find one and the sanity ends forever when you marry one.

Love is not blind – had it been, I surely would have found a girlfriend by now.

My wife looks killing, her dishes too are, just dare to try them once.

My husband is the most daring man in the world. He dares to eat everyday, whatever I took.

While shopping I always trust my wife's choices she has a far better choice than me. I chose her, while she chose me.

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